Paper Dearest

Why is it that I can bear my soul to you paper?
Old lover old friend paper.
You do not judge me paper
so it is upon you I carve my
past sins in bloody ink
paper.
Upon you I bear my soul.

Why is it that you have yet to die paper?
My indiscretions should have suffocated you;
weighing down upon you
like the soil upon the dead in my head;
20feet under in your earthly bed
caressed by the pain and ghosts of the pasts-paper.

Why is it that I can bear my soul to you paper?
Perhaps it is because you are as cold as I
in all my frigid glory
and ice queen upon her thrown
emotional subjects frozen in time.
Paper,
Paper,
Paper.
Mind paper thin, line upon
line of paper reasons, lies,
and memories etched into my paper mind.

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Bloody Sacrifices

My throat is closing
I cannot breath
hands stretched out
someone help be please
fingers grasp the air
in attempt to find fingers to grasp
even though by now i’ve learned
from time, that no one
can help you as you can help yourself

My throat is closing
I cannot breathe
I am dying
my dreams are dying
who I could be is dying
and I am struggling to save
sweat, blood and tears

My throat is closing
Slit my throat
and let my blood run free
blood sacrifice for blood sacrifice
living gold for gold
My throat is closing .
I cannot breathe.